


Not Good at Life, Can't Fix Yours

by boy_boy_doggins



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: M/M, terrible garbage but im posting it anyway :)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-07-21 19:09:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7400137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boy_boy_doggins/pseuds/boy_boy_doggins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wonwoo has a confession, Minghao thinks about Anastasia too much</p><p> </p><p>characterization from crumbling's MALL AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Good at Life, Can't Fix Yours

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [MALL AU](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5268311) by [crumbling](https://archiveofourown.org/users/crumbling/pseuds/crumbling). 



“Hey,” Wonwoo whispered, his voice comically loud, his eyes wide. “Wanna hear a secret?”

 

Minghao sighed and nodded, resigned. Something about his face made people want to confide in him. Vernon said it was his "I’ve-got-my-shit-together” vibe that made other people think that, hey, maybe if they wordvomited all their concerns onto him he could magically fix it so that they, too, could have their shit together. Minghao had laughed, and then realized that Vernon was serious.

 

“You’ll never believe this,” Wonwoo said giddily, wiggling closer to him and resembling- there was no other word for it- an puppy. An excited, stoned-out-of-its-mind puppy. Probably a doberman, which Minghao thought was a fierce dog, and Wonwoo was nothing if not desperately trying to look fierce.

 

Wonwoo was staring at him, clearly expecting a reply to his promise of an incredible, life-altering secret. “What won’t I believe?” Minghao asked in a monotone, long-suffering.

 

Wonwoo smiled dreamily. “I’m in love with Mingyu, man.”

 

Minghao stared at him, because, yes, while this was blatantly obvious, he had never expected Wonwoo to say anything about it _out loud_.

 

“It’s crazy,” Wonwoo continued, off in his own world that probably permanently smelled like cigarettes and had statues of Mingyu and dobermans planted everywhere. Probably there was a big, grassy field where both Mingyu and the dobermans could run free.

 

Minghao started to laugh and bit his tongue, which he thought was possibly God trying to tell him to stop smoking weed. Although he doubted that God would be concerned over his puny existence, or that He would give two shits about a random teenage boy getting high on a Saturday.

 

Minghao was saved from his impending existential crisis slash deep internal debate about the Lord’s position on the legality of marijuana, by the sound of someone speaking passionately into his right ear. He returned laboriously to the real world, where it appeared Wonwoo had wiggled even closer to him and had also begun ranting. He sounded strangely passionate, considering both how stoned he was and that he was _Wonwoo_ , of all people.

 

“-sometimes I look at him and I gotta take a breather, cause what the fuck did I do to deserve him? Man, I dunno. It’s crazy.” Wonwoo shook his head in amazement. “When he smiles I feel like my heart is going to explode. Like, how the fuck, man. I’m also really into his teeth. Shit.”

 

“Hmmm. Interesting. What’s his opinion on legalizing it?” Minghao asked.

 

“What? Dunno, probably for, I guess.” Wonwoo shrugged, his bony-ass shoulder digging uncomfortably into Minghao’s side. He was really touchy when stoned, which put everyone around him at risk of a bloody stabbing via hip or elbow. Minghao briefly considered pressing charges for attempted murder, but decided against it because that would probably make things awkward. There was nothing Minghao hated more than when things got awkward. It was kind of strange then that he was friends with Vernon, possibly the most awkward person alive, but it is what it is.

 

“-imagine my future and I see me and him and that’s it. I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna do after college but I know Mingyu’s gotta be there.” Wonwoo was still talking. He had somehow managed to get even closer to Minghao, although this possibility had previously seemed both unwelcome and impossible.

 

“You should marry him,” Minghao mumbled offhandedly, trying to recall how he and Vernon had become friends. He could not remember for the life of him.

 

“I want to,” Wonwoo said, with the tone of someone airing some seriously dirty laundry. “I actually really want to.” 

 

Minghao had a vague feeling that he should be reeling in shock, but he couldn’t remember exactly why. He didn't remember a lot of things, such as how he and Vernon had met; now he was trying to remember how he had met everybody else in the group.

 

“I think he’s going to leave me though. Or maybe die. He could get hit by a car real easy.”

 

“What the fuck,” Minghao muttered, because he could remember how he met Chan (grocery store) and Jun (same church), but he could not freaking remember how he met anybody else. If his memory was this bad, what else was he forgetting?

 

“I know, right?” Wonwoo said, relieved. “It’s ridiculous. But I’m still afraid. I’m afraid of a lot of shit like you wouldn’t believe. I’m afraid I’ll become like my mom, or my dad. I’m afraid Mingyu will stay with me anyway, even if I turn into an abusive piece of shit. Who’s gonna protect him?”

 

“You’d never hurt him, that’s ridiculous,” Minghao muttered, because even if he was currently in the seventh circle of hell in terms of thoughts his brain could think, he could still point out the obvious. “Holy shit, what if I’m Anastasia.”

 

“I don’t want to,” Wonwoo sighed, missing the part about Anastasia. “I wish I could travel into the future and make sure I turn into a good person. It could be like that movie, I could kill myself if I turn out to be a douchebag. That would be some interesting shit.”

 

“Did Anastasia time travel in her movie? Was that a thing?”

 

“Dunno, man.” Wonwoo shrugged. “Dmitri was hot though.” He stretched, arching his back until it popped. “Holy shit I really want fries.” He settled back into the fabric of the couch as if trying to become one with both it and Minghao’s side. “This shitty fucking couch is too comfy though. I don’t wanna move.”

 

‘I think you mean my lap is too comfy, you bony fucker,' Minghao wanted to say, or maybe did say out loud but didn’t notice. 

 

“If you were a lost princess, which country would you be from?” he asked instead. He felt like his thoughts were moving too fast for his brain to keep up. “Man, my brain is gonna overheat and die just like the engine Seungcheol’s disgusting car,” he mumbled morosely. Wonwoo patted him reassuringly on the head.

 

“I’d be the princess of America, cause that’s where I fucking live. Obviously." Wonwoo laughed mirthlessly. "Hah, imagine my mother as a queen. That would be some tragic shit.” He lapsed into silence, frowning.

 

“She never tells me she loves me,” he finally resumed. “I don’t think she ever has.”

 

Minghao blinked hazily and shook his head, because he had a feeling things were about to get awkward and he was not equipped to handle emotion of any kind, especially not from someone like Wonwoo, who had emotion to spare and never let it see the light of day. “Help me, Anastasia,” he mumbled, a quick prayer to the gods of Not-Disney™.

 

“I don’t tell Mingyu that I love him,” Wonwoo said, introspective in a bad way. “Besides that one time, I never do.”

 

“He knows.” Minghao said it awkwardly, even if it was the truth, and cursed himself and his terrible social skills to hell.

 

Wonwoo sighed to himself, soft and small. “He tells me he loves me all the time and I never say it back. I hate that I never say it back. What kind of person can’t even tell his boyfriend that he loves him?”

 

Minghao shifted uncomfortably on the couch. “That sucks,” he mumbled lamely. Anastasia had clearly not helped him. He considered asking Ariel. Actual-Disney™, in all its wealthy and popular glory, would probably be a more powerful pagan god that Dreamworks. Anastasia was a Dreamworks movie, right? Minghao felt slightly ashamed that he didn’t even know the studio of his favorite movie of all time, considering he had been watching it religiously since he'd turned ten and a half. “You should practice saying you love people more often,” he said, as a peace offering of shitty advice. He had been told several times that people needed comfort more than solutions when they confided in him, but he had no idea how to comfort anybody and always ended up giving advice as a defense mechanism.

 

Wonwoo snorted. “What, I should tell Seungcheol I love him?”

 

“No, dude, tell… Jeonghan you love him. Or Soonyoung, or Jihoon. Maybe not Jihoon, actually. Don’t. But, uh, for other people try telling them so that you can practice. Platonically, obviously. You know.”

 

“Huh,” Wonwoo mused. “That is some… terrible advice. Wow.” He giggled and snuggled into Minghao’s chest. “I though you had your shit together, dude.”

 

“It is actual bullshit that people think that about me.”

 

“Too bad,” Wonwoo sighed. “Fuck I’m hungry. I just dropped some heavy shit. It’s like. All over everywhere. If you tell anybody I’ll kill you.”

 

“Kay.” Minghao settled and arm around him and leaned back into the couch, trying to play the entirety of Anastasia’s one hour thirty-five minute runtime on the backs of his eyelids. He needed to assure himself he was still a true fan.

 

When he woke up however many hours later, Wonwoo was curled up next to him. Asleep, he looked vulnerable, and sad. Minghao felt an ache in his chest, although he couldn’t remember exactly what for. He shrugged and dragged himself up off the couch, going in search of sugar-laden dry goods.

 

He returned to the couch some time later, after having spent half an hour trying to find a dvd of the movie Anastasia. He really needed to watch it again before he had a mental breakdown or something.

 

“You want?” he asked, offering some off-brand cereal to Wonwoo, who blinked owlishly up at him. He was still curled on the couch, his hair sticking up in a giant tuft. 

 

“Mmmm,” he groaned, which wasn’t really an answer, but he did make grabby hands at the box which Minghao assumed was a yes.

 

“You’re gonna get diabetes and die,” Minghao said helpfully. Wonwoo ignored him.

 

“Listen,” he said menacingly around a mouthful of disturbingly pink cereal. “I don’t remember what I said today, but if you repeat any of it to anyone I’ll kill you.”

 

Minghao stared for a moment, then sighed and flopped down on the couch next to him.

 

“Dude,” he said finally. “I’m not good at emotions, mine or anyone else’s. The last thing I wanna do is rehash your convoluted mess of soft-and-fuzzy feelings with somebody else.”

 

“Emotionally inept, I like that,” Wonwoo said approvingly, and high-fived him.

 

 

__________________________

 

 

 

“Dude,” Vernon whispered frantically on the other end of the line, “you are not going to believe this.”

 

“Why are you calling me at three a.m.?” Minghao mumbled, squinting at the unforgiving brightness of his phone.

 

“Wonwoo just told me he loves me. I am freaked the fuck out. What if he, like, tries to kill me or something? What if it’s a warning?”

 

Minghao pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “Dude. You’re going to be fine. _Please_  go to sleep.”

 

“Shit, what if he’s, like, fallen in love with me?” Vernon mumbled, clearly not going to give in to Minghao’s desperate, sleep-deprived pleading. “What if he’s leaving Mingyu for me? Oh my god, he’ll be crushed when I reject him. He might actually kill me."

 

“He’s not leaving Mingyu for you,” Minghao mumbled tiredly. “He’s into his teeth. Look, okay, Wonwoo is probably not going to kill you. He’s bad at communication, that’s all.”

 

Vernon snorted. “No shit.” A pause. “Wait, what the fuck do you mean by teeth? Wonwoo has a thing for his fangs? Since when? How did you learn this?” Vernon’s voice had rapidly risen in excitement and pitch, so that by the end of his sentence he was practically screeching.

 

“Last Saturday was really interesting,” Minghao said shortly, remembering Wonwoo's warning, and hung up on him.

**Author's Note:**

> this is based off characterization in MALL AU by crumbling and oldestcomputer, which is both very funny and very sad
> 
>  
> 
> anyway.... I've never been high, as I'm sure you can tell :/// but it's all good


End file.
